The following video is a scene from the movie Vicki Christina Barcelona.
It is the most talked about and dissected scene in Pick Up Artist community (PUA).
Many guys who have watched this scene, want to be able to do, what the lead actor does in this particular scene, which is to walk across, to the table of two women seated in the same restaurant and speak to them with such confidence and directness.
And even in pua community, this video epitomizes what a man should be like with women.
However, the people(including pua coaches) who have analysed this video, have missed (maybe intentionally) one key factor that really explain the dynamics between Men and Women.
And because of this mischievous slip, most guys who look up to this video for inspiration, form misconceptions of how mating dynamics work.
On the surface in this video, it seems that a man walked up to a woman seated on a table with her friend, spoke to them in direct manner with cavalier confidence and invited them with him to some cute Spanish town.
Now let me uncover an important aspect that created the background for the man (Xavier Badiem) to walk up to two women.
Before he walked up to these two women in the video, there was an implicit invitation from one of the woman(Scarlett Johnson) which provoke him to walk up to these two women.
If you watch especially first minute of the video, Scarlett Johnson has an open energy towards him. She keeps looking at him. And ever her friend remarks at her incessant glance at the man, which actually pave the way for the man to walk up to the women and speak with such directness and confidence.
And this is how the mating dynamics has always played out since ages.
A woman invites a man ( through signals) to approach her and he follows her cue and walks up to her.
Guys, who are inflicting punishment on themelves for not being able to walk up to any woman and talk their way out, should understand that it is not as simple as walking up to any woman.
There is dance that happens before that, which is initiated by women.
Now, the question arises;
“But no woman gives me signals of invitation?”
Well, invitational approach maybe the purest and natural form of mating, but not the only one.
In my perspective there are two more;
- Proximity based approach
- Cold calling approaching
I will go into the merit and demerits of both these way of approaching and meeting women in my next post..