Just to poke myself, I am an expert on this particular topic, as I have been, multiple times in a situation where a woman pulled herself away from me for good.
Because I made them center of my day to day life.
And this is that one thing I was referring to; A woman do not want to be *the adventure* of the man, she wants to be taken on one.
Again reflecting on my personal life, I remember, during my 12th boards exams, I used to go all the way to pick up this one girl (beautiful she was) at her place, then drop her to her exam center and then I went to my center. And after the exam day, I went to pick her at her exam center, drop her home and then come back home. And distances were not in close proximity.
Yes, we did have pre existing chemistry, which faded away (from her end) after my antics.
She became my adventure, I was sucking her energy for my strength.
I have done that multiple times, even after that episode. Somehow, something shifted in me, once a woman started to like me with certain warmth. These girls were those, who I also had affinity for too.
Have you ever wondered why guys who are spontaneous, less available, less affectionate, more casual tend to make a woman fall hard for them?
Simple because they don’t make the woman the adventure.
What’s the biology or psychology of women here?
I am not sure, but I have read somewhere that bible states the role of manhood and womanhood; and it mentions (or maybe interpreted) that a man’s heart is made to go on adventures, leaving his beloved behind.
My personal examination and reflection have thrown up some answers about the heart of a man who makes a woman his adventure.
I feel, with myself and other men, we lacked a personal sense of journey. We don’t have our own adventure, instead we have only obligations.
We have nothing much to hold on to for our strength, fulfillment other than fulfilling our responsibilities as a way to get through our day.
The larger source of our strength, our sense of identity, validation should be be out there not in her. Yes, having a pretty warm feminine soul is also a need for a masculine soul, but that doesn’t mean, she comes the primary source.
I am in no way suggesting to give away with affection for the woman. But don’t make your affection too overwhelming for her to take in.
Have you ever, walked around, roaming places all by yourself only to think about her?
I have. It’s not a nice thing to do. Falling for a girl in her absence, builds heavy energy within us. And that energy is felt by her, when you come in her presence.
Being on your adventure, doesn’t mean you forget about a woman. It doesn’t mean you disregard her. It simply means you have something to look forward on larger sphere that’s not her. It means you have something to do that gives you a meaning that is not limited to accumulation.
One prime example of the man who resembles what I mean is Pakistan Prime Minister, ex- cricketer Imran Khan. He always had and still do, a mission larger than him. But at the same time, he was always in touch with his masculine affinity for women.
However another man, comes to my mind, who changed the world, was on a glorious adventure, but lacked a mischievous spirit with regard to women was Steve Jobs.
I am reiterating the point, there has to be both a sense of journey and mischievous spirit in a man.