Bar Scene: Break Down.

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  • Re-Watch the clip.

Breakdown of the clip.

Scene: Bunch of friends/colleagues in a bar having dinner and drinks. One of the guys, let’s call him Guy A spots an attractive woman by the bar counter with her friends. With some encouragement from his friends he decides to approach her and her friends. And so he physically moves to approach.

The Guy A energy is high and opens with a direct opener. (Note: One of the female friend informs her friend who is the target (just for reference) about Guy A by saying “Incoming”)

So by and large, women are extremely aware of their surroundings in context like these.
The wisdom is that Approach begins before a guy opens his mouth.

He offers to buy them drinks (cliche, sometimes offensive with successful women ; avoid these kinds of questions. Rather suggest “let’s have shots together”)

The Guy A has unnecessary energy which can be view as overcompensating or try hard energy.

At 0:56 seconds, Guy A says “I see you are a successful woman”.
(Makes him sound like he is not on her level. Unnecessary and Not needed at this point)

He loses the eye color game.

Guy B comes in the picture. There are no elements of any unnecessary on him. Smiles mildly, looks intensely, Picks his words.

Guy B wins the game of Eye color and also their attention.
(Look into woman eyes. It unravels lot more than just eye color of a woman).

Clearly now the Guy B has piqued the interest of the woman. She offers her shot to Guy B and takes the tab.

(Notice at 1:53 seconds, while they are all are doing cheering ritual before gulping the shot, the eyes of the woman are hung on to Guy B. That’s a strong non verbal indicator of interest).

Guy A continues his try hard efforts, or some call it high energy game. I call it Unnecessary.

Once the woman reaches the dance floor, first thing she does is makes eye contact with the Guy B.

Guy B is clear about his expression and how he wants to represent himself, While Guy A is in his head, all over the place.

The woman in the question is the leader of the pack. In a group situation, make sure you know who is the leader of the pack and address her attentively.

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